...no bestfriend!

As i was surfing the net, i found a site that tells about friendship. I read some of the articles there and just sad of what i learned. I learned about "Best friend"…. and realized i dont even have one.
A friend who knew me better than I knew myself. The best friend who always knew how to get a smile out of me, who had always been there through the thick and thin of growing up. The only person that ever made me feel better about myself and my problems.

Yes, it’s true I have a lot of friends. They are so many to mention… childhood friends, classmates who then became my friends, etc. I even have six whom i consider as my closest friends, but still… nobody would i think is my best friend.
As I travel this journey called life, friends just come and go. Some are still there, old friends and new friends. I’m blessed i have them in my life. But now I realized, as i reminisced the past….during the rainy days and sunny days …it makes me sad that i don’t remember even a single person who shares with me under the rain.

Maybe it is my character that hinders me to find my bestfriend. I have a lot of friends but I always chose to keep my problems on my self. I always hide the pain with my smile and happy gestures, and nobody will notice the burdens i have.

I remember my friend told me that maybe I’m not normal, because for the long time that we’ve been together, I never confide a problem with her and she always sees me with smile. She never heard a problem from me. She also added, maybe I’m numb.

I asked myself, "Am I numb?". No! I’m not! Why I still have these worries? Why I can still feel the pain of lossing. I have a lot of problems to tell you… but I would rather keep it to myself for I don’t want to bother anybody with my trouble! I’ve been into problems many times and I don’t even remember how god helped me to get through it. And see…I’m still here with this journey, and I can say, somehow, I’m surviving.

I soon discovered that I really had a best friend (aside from my god), one who could always make me smile and would never disappoint me when the world is bitter to me. A best friend who will care my heart better than anyone else in the world —

myself.